BDSM MEDIA NEWS!!!!
August 22, 2013
Fifty shades of wellbeing?(Dominatrix Eva).
Source: Smh.com.au. - Sidney Morning Herald - Australia
AUSTRALIA - Eva is an educated, articulate, hard-working, 28-year-old from Sydney's inner west who travels the world with her profession.
Her clients are a cross section of individuals that are a reflection of who we would all meet in our day-to- day lives, varying in personality, age and occupation.
Eva is a dominatrix and BDSM expert. BDSM is a variety of erotic practices involving dominance and submission, role-playing, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics.
When the results of a recent
study, were released, revealing people involved in the
BDSM, community scored better on certain mental health indicators than their vanilla counterparts, Eva, a professional dominatrix, wasn't entirely surprised.
Advertisement BSDM is a far cry from the stale and scary leather-clad, gimp-mask, harness-wearing '80s stereotypes or those that appear in Fifty Shades of Grey, of a spoilt multimillionaire with a red room, a temper and the ability of a boy scout when it comes to knotting silk ties.
Eva defines BDSM as a form of clear communication: "It's very simple, you need to communicate what you want in order to get what you want.
"To do that, a certain level of self-awareness, confidence and ability to communicate your own boundaries and needs clearly, is required."
Eva believes the key to practising BDSM in a fulfilling way is honesty. All parties need to bring that to the table. "BDSM is an awareness of yourself and how you affect others, it's compassion in action with an erotic kick," says Eva.
It's this explanation of BDSM that puts the results of the study into a clearer context.
Unaware of the purpose of the study, more than 1300 participants of mixed backgrounds, age and sexual preference were questioned on personality, wellbeing, sensitivity to rejection and their attachment in relationships.
Psychologist and author of the study Andreas Wismejier found that those from a BDSM lifestyle were found to be less neurotic, more open as well as more aware of and sensitive to rejection. They were also more secure in their relationships and had a better overall wellbeing.
"People from a BDSM lifestyle tend to be more aware of and communicative of their sexual desires," says Wismejier.
"Some of them have done some 'hard psychological work' to accept and live with sexual needs that are beyond the scope of what is often considered socially acceptable to discuss in the mainstream."
Wismejier believes the study confirms that an interest in the practices of the lifestyle, which is largely considered as "non-normative", signals a personality that's more open to a diverse range of experiences.
The BDSM community has over the years come under fire, enduring a range of opinions that don't necessarily reflect its practices.
The American Psychological Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual classifies the lifestyle under "paraphilia", which encompasses unusual sexual preferences, and still considers sexual masochism a disorder if it causes people stress or dysfunction in their lives.
While admitting that the research may not be mainstream, Wismejier hopes it will bolster the argument around removing the stigma of BDSM as a mental disorder and prompt further investigations.
So what are the core practices or principals behind BDSM?Eva says that BDSM is essentially the practice and awareness of dominance and submission through interpersonal dynamics.
"To me, how this is explored through fetishes or lifestyles is almost secondary," says Eva, who offers her clients more than 70 types of services to address and sate their preferred needs.
So why does someone choose to become involved in the BDSM lifestyle? "I felt it was a raw space where the clarity of my own dominant personality had room to understand itself," says Eva.
To be interested in a BDSM lifestyle does not mean going to dungeons or being tortured. Eva says there are a number of ways to be an active member of the BDSM community.
"You can be involved through play parties, munches or meets, or connect with like-minded people through online forums and groups," she says.
While Eva admits her involvement in these are minimal, her identification with what these groups promote is strong.
"I admire those who champion the lifestyle and host forums, and events to grow the community," she says. "I'm just more of an intimate personality and prefer to share my identity and its associations with BDSM with those that I meet."
Since dedicating her life to BDSM professionally, Eva admits it's been an intense journey, but one that has enabled her to attain a greater social awareness.
"This lifestyle choice has given me a wiser use of my personality in my day to day and offers me a freedom of identity and lifestyle that fits who I am all too well," she says.
Eva hasn't revealed her profession to her family, but she says her friends have been nothing but supportive.
"I love what I do, simply because I get to share much more intimate and honest moments with my clients and their desires," concludes Eva.
So could a little kink, be healthier than we think?
See larger photo on:
www.smh.com.au.
