BDSM MEDIA NEWS!!!!
December 12, 2014
Book: Sex, Lies & Banking by Lily Temperley
*Lily Temperley from London embarked on affair with powerful married man
*He lavished her with expensive holidays, designer clothes and Champagne
*But relationship soon became controlling, with Lily groomed for orgies
*He would dictate her clothes, hair and even the shade of her nail varnish
Source: Dailymail.co.uk. - The Daily Mail - UK
UK - A multi-millionaire businessman starts a controlling love affair with a woman several years his junior, flying her away to expensive destinations and picking out beautiful clothes for her to wear.
But with the perks come the demands in the bedroom, the requests to indulge in sexual activities that would otherwise have gone unexperienced.
It's a story that we are well-versed in now; Anastasia Steele meets Christian Grey and the wide-eyed young woman starts an exciting romance with a successful but dangerous businessman.
But this isn't Fifty Shades Of Grey. This is the real-life story of a woman from London using the nom de plume Lily Temperley.
Lily is a beautiful young city worker who was sucked into a controlling affair with a high-flying, highly-sexed banking executive who dictated how she looked and behaved.
The only big difference between this story and E.L James's fictional account is that Lily’s Mr Grey was married.
But while Anastasia ended up marrying her lover, Lily gave up her well-paid job and left the profession after her partner's controlling behaviour proved too much.
Much like Anastasia, Lily was a young woman swayed by the power and success of her partner, who we will call Patrick Harrington.
He was a big-shot in the world of banking, where excess and bravado were key players, and the power was intoxicating.
Lily worked in finance in the back office of one of the UK's biggest banks, where high-rolling traders spent tens of thousands of pounds on lavish dinners and were given bonuses in the millions.
Patrick was one of the senior executives at the company; he had a reputation as a ladies' man, a top floor office and an expense account that ran into hundreds of thousands.
Lily wasn’t alone in falling for Patrick - in the City environment, the heady mix of long hours, big money and office intimidation often leads to affairs.
She told MailOnline: 'Infidelity was rife. I don't know if the wives at home knew of it or were just blissfully unaware.
'I'd go out with men from the office to a bar and see them slipping their wedding ring in their pocket as they walked inside.
'It was almost like an unspoken law in some ways. There were the high-rolling men who would buy Champagne for a certain set of women, knowing that was enough to guarantee them something at the end of the night.
'Or they would fly an assistant or administrator away with them on a business trip with expectation that although they had a wife at home, they would be the girlfriend for a week.
'When an all-expenses-paid trip to New York presents itself to someone who has never been first class or slept in five-star hotels, they do get swayed by it.'
It was at one of these alcohol-fuelled meetings in a bar near work that Lily first fell for the charms of senior executive Harrington.
A low-maintenance girl from the countryside, Lily had never imagined she would be one of the women easily bought with expensive Champagne and material gifts.
She said: 'I always thought that he was one of those old charmers - he spoke very well and was had a reputation as a ladies' man.
'But it wasn't until we were in drinking situations that he made it clear he wanted to take me out to dinner.
'I was very resistant initially because I knew where it was going to lead, but I eventually just got won over by expensive gifts and amazing holidays.
'I do have my head screwed on and I wanted to pursue a career and settle down, but my head got turned.'
Soon, Lily was being whisked away on countless five-star holidays, from a Bergdorf Goodman shopping weekend in New York, to break in Tuscany, Paris or the Caribbean.
She said: 'He knew my dress and shoe size and my closet and shoe cabinet is all the better for it.
'We would go and buy six or eight dresses from Dolce & Gabbana, Prada, or wherever it was.
'He was very up on style, so he already had an idea in his head that he wanted me in a short cocktail dress or something body-hugging or whatever.
'It was amazing, because we would go and spend a weekend in New York and I would come away with these pretty dresses and matching shoes.'
But the expensive luxury masked a more sinister side to Patrick's personality.
Soon, he was dictating the way that Lily dressed, how she wore her hair, even the shade of nail polish.
She said: 'He was very controlling.
'There was an expectation that I was dressed a certain way and that my hair and nails were done and that I was well presented.
'Once, I went to the nail salon at work and I came back with a French manicure.
'He said to me, "I told you to get red".
'I just looked at him and thought, this makes no odds and I don't know why we're arguing about the colour of my nails, it was just a point to prove there was control there.'
The control also reached into their sex lives, with Patrick pressurising Lily into sordid sex games.
She said: 'The guy that I was with was incredibly highly sexed and there was an attempt to groom me into participating in swingers' parties and that sort of thing.
'He had a real reputation among the women in the company for his sexual nature.
'I wouldn't be surprised if he had been sleeping with other people from the business while we were together and even prostitutes.'
Lily's view of her partner and the business they worked in only started to break down completely when the financial crisis fully took hold.
As members of the public struggled to keep their jobs and homes as a result of the recession, many City workers were still spending
with reckless abandon, including Patrick, who thought nothing of splashing thousands of pounds of the company’s money on fancy weekends away.
She said: 'You either stay and are complicit or you fully take yourself out of it and I decided to take myself out of it - both the job and the relationship.'
Putting an end to the romance was easier said than done though and Patrick refused to accept their affair was over.
Lily eventually had to quit her job and move counties, changing phone numbers and emails to escape his constant messages.
She said: 'It proved to be difficult for a good 18 months afterwards.
'He couldn't handle that he wasn't in control of this situation - he always had to be in control.'
But after leaving the industry and blocking his access, she finally was free two years after ending it.
She has since decided to write a book, out now, based on her experiences.
Lily hopes it will serve as a warning to young women who are considering getting involved in a relationship with a married man.
But she also wants the tale to serve as an anchor for City workers who have started to become lost in the excess and greed.
She said: 'The book is basically a high flyer's diary.
'It really is an insight into banking, the greed and extravagance, but with names changed so that people can't be identified.
'But I hope it will ring some bells for anyone who finds themselves in the same position.'
Sex, Lies & Banking by Lily Temperley is out now published by Clink Street Publishing.
BULLYING, MULTI-MILLION POUND BONUSES, TAX-DODGING AND FAKE EXPENSES - LILY'S OTHER TALES OF EXCESS IN THE CITY
Pay packets and tax-dodging:
Lily: 'I worked in finance and had access to a lot of financial data, so I could see what the bank was paying employees - we're talking about people who would win the lottery every year and then some.
'I would always wonder why these people were coming back to work after they've just been given seven-figure bonuses - people were being paid tens of millions in one year alone.
'There was also a handful of people who got paid in tax effective schemes to maximise their net take home, they were domiciled in various countries like Cayman Islands or Monaco, where the tax rates are low or non-existent.
'So these people were being rewarded for what they brought to the bank but also what they took home was the majority of it.'
Expenses:
Lily: 'They would put business dinners on expenses where the food was often thrown in for free because they had spent so much money on the alcohol.
'I saw one case where people ended up getting disciplined after spending £40,000 on a single meal for six people.
'Expenses were used on personal trips away, on things that definitely had no purpose for the business, and there was a very high emphasis placed on extravagance and glamour.'
Bullying:
The more senior staff took pride in shaming newer recruits, seeing how long they took to break.
Lily said: 'One of the senior management used to come into our department where he would trawl the floor, lifting the ties of different men to see what brand they were wearing.
'He was carrying a pair of scissors and if he didn't like the brand he saw, he would snip the tie off just under the tie knot.
'Then he would tell them to go shop in Hermes or somewhere similar and not in Marks and Spencer or Thomas Pink.' See more larger photo's:
www.dailymail.co.uk.
