BDSM MEDIA NEWS!!!!
August 28, 2015
Here’s why you should tell your friends and family you’re into BDSM
Source: Metro.co.uk. - Metro.co.uk - UK
UK - Would you tell your friends and family you’re into BDSM?
For most, the reflexive answer’s an immediate no.
But practicing BDSM in my personal life and as a professional dominatrix has taught me that there are some situations where telling makes sense.
If you’re expIoring your fantasies with people you don’t yet trust, it’s wise to tell someone the bare outlines of what you’re doing.
You don’t need to provide all the details, but before meeting a new play partner, tell a trusted friend where you’ll be and who you’ll be with, and let them know if you might be engaging in activities that leave you vulnerable.
Your friend can ring or text you at a pre-arranged time.
If you don’t answer, they can check in on you, or contact the police.
This arrangement is good practice for anyone meeting someone new, but it’s especially prudent if you’re, say, planning to be tied up.
Of course, nobody’s obliged to discuss their sexual preferences.
Even after Fifty Shades Of Grey brought the idea of BDSM into mainstream life, the reality remains taboo and socially stigmatised.
People can lose their jobs or face child custody battles when their interest in BDSM is outed by a vengeful ex.
While the taboo of BDSM is a good reason to keep it quiet at work, telling those friends and family who matter most to you can partially protect you from the possibility of personal blackmail.
Hearing the news from you will almost always be better than hearing on social media or in court.
Beyond safety, being open can build closer relationships.
Telling your closest confidantes that you do BDSM can prevent secret-keeping from being a barrier to their advice and support.
It can prevent worry - it’s better for family and friends to be told that a bruised bum was happily and consensually achieved, rather than leaving them to worry about potential abuse.
If you’re in a relationship that involves a significant level of power exchange - that is, a dom-sub relationship that goes beyond bedroom activities - keeping it secret can leave you isolated if it goes wrong.
Just like everyone in relationships, you deserve the support of your friends and family, in good and bad times.
I have a good friend who is kind enough to let me vent about occasional problems in my relationships.
My problems are rarely with the BDSM aspect of the relationship - they’re ordinary complaints about money, chores and communication.
But it is great to be able to talk openly and unselfconsciously about my worries, without hiding anything or having to justify my lifestyle if it comes up incidentally during conversation.
Of course, not everyone in your life will be prepared, and comfortable, to know any details of your relationship or your sex life.
Choose the right people, and sound them out: a casual conversation about books like Fifty Shades is a good way to measure a person’s views.
Be clear why you’re sharing - you’re not looking to shock, or to involve them in your sex life - you’re being honest for your own well being and safety.
If friends and family truly care about you, they’ll be happy to hear that you’re happy and safe, and they’ll support you when you need help.
You could even find yourself dispelling myths, or offering a listening ear, in turn, to others in your circle with an interest in BDSM.
See larger photo's & Poll:
metro.co.uk.
BDSMradio.EU Links:
Listen 24/7 Hits, Oldies & BDSM Songs:
BDSMradio.EU/eng.
E-mail:
bdsmradioeu@hotmail.com.
Like us page on Facebook:
Facebook.com/BDSMradioEUnl.
BDSM group Facebook:
Facebook.com/groups/bdsmradioeu.
Fetlife:
Fetlife.com/users/1242644.
Twitter:
Twitter.com/BDSMRTVHolland.
